On this day...
On this day 6 years ago, I had surgery. Facebook told me so. It's true too. At this time 6 years ago I was probably in the ICU at Phoenix Children's Hospital writhing in pain after having 1/4 of my left lung removed. I was on a ventilator with a chest tubes. I was miserable.
Back Story:
When you are officially declared "cancer free" there is still a possibility that your cancer, or another cancer will return. So you are put on a scan regime. The regimen changes over time, the longer you go, the less often you have to go. So rewind to January of 2010. I went in for my scans, which had always been clear. A few days later my parents got the call that every parent of a childhood cancer survivor NEVER wants. Something showed up on my scan that the doctor was not happy about. I had a "growth" on my left lung. This was even more disconcerting considering my cancer had been in my left rib cage. The doctor wanted it out, and he wanted it out yesterday.
I was living in Flagstaff, going to college, preparing to compete with my dance team at Nationals. My life was great. I was actually getting ready for our team dinner when my parents called me. I don't remember a whole lot about that evening. My roommates packed my bags and one of them drove me 4 hours home. When I walked in the door my family was gathered around the dinner table. I remember having Italian Wedding Soup. I remember reviving a blessing. And I remember not being able to fall asleep.
The following morning I woke up to my grandma screaming "Get UP! It's SNOWING! WE NEED TO LEAVE NOW!". Quite dramatic. Comical now. But also serious. We had to get out of our little mountain town and to Phoenix Children's Hospital in time for my surgery. When it snows, they often close the road between home and Phoenix. My uncle called a friend who told us to get to the edge of town and he'd have a squad car take us through. (Perks of living in a small town).
The next few minutes were chaotic. My grandma was running through the house and stubbed her toe on the evil coffee table. It was sticking out perpendicular to her foot. Clearly broken. My dad (a doctor) told her he needed to set it. She sat down and held her foot up. He reached for the toe and...BAM! She kicked him! He said, in so many words, that she could deal with a broken toe, and we were out the door.
My parent's driveway is long and steep. And it was covered in quite a few inches of snow. Somehow, we managed to make it down (sliding the whole way) safely. As we made it to the outskirts of town, we could see the cars backed up and at a complete halt. My dad drove up the edge and sure enough, the squad car was waiting for us. We were informed that if there was any incident driving the pass, we would be held solely accountable. Considering the circumstances, we pushed onward.
Soon enough we were at the hospital waiting in pre-op. I remember my best friend being there, just like she always was, along with my family. That's really all I remember until I woke up from surgery. I've been told though, that I was waving like a princess as they wheeled me back to surgery.
The next thing I remember is waking up in ICU and being told that once the chest tube was out, they would move me up to the 2nd floor. My. Heart. Stopped.
The second floor is the cancer floor. That was my home 4 years earlier. That's where I fought for my life. And if they were sending me there than that must mean that something is not right. Thankfully, they were doing it out of kindness, thinking I would "feel most at home there". Bless their hearts. And it was nice to see my nurses and know that I'd be taken care of.
Thankfully, a few days later I was released with a clean bill of health. The growth was a benign. A "gang of cells" that formed together to mimic a Ewing's Tumor. What a relief.
What is even crazier is... years after this event, I'm sitting with my inlaws talking about the day that my nephew was born. My mother in law is telling me about this crazy morning, when they woke up to snow and my sister in law was bound and determined to get to Mesa to have her baby. I thought, "gosh this sounds familiar...". They were the last people that were let through, given the same warning we received. Yep. 6 years ago on this day our nephew was born! I think that is pretty darn cool. Happy birthday Kaden!!!
Today, at this moment, I am sitting at my parent's dinner table with my husband and grandma. We are in the middle of about 4 different projects. I am working on a puzzle, my husband is on a call with an app designer for his business, I am writing this, and my grandma is addressing envelopes for what I am thinking is a surprise party... for me (I'll be 10 years cancer free in February)... hehe. It's funny how life works isn't it?
This post is more of a memoir for me I suppose. It serves no real purpose. There is no motivation that a reader can walk away with. Sorry. But it feels good for me to write about this experience because it's one that I tend to forget (by choice perhaps?).
<3 Mo
(insert princess wave here)
Back Story:
When you are officially declared "cancer free" there is still a possibility that your cancer, or another cancer will return. So you are put on a scan regime. The regimen changes over time, the longer you go, the less often you have to go. So rewind to January of 2010. I went in for my scans, which had always been clear. A few days later my parents got the call that every parent of a childhood cancer survivor NEVER wants. Something showed up on my scan that the doctor was not happy about. I had a "growth" on my left lung. This was even more disconcerting considering my cancer had been in my left rib cage. The doctor wanted it out, and he wanted it out yesterday.
I was living in Flagstaff, going to college, preparing to compete with my dance team at Nationals. My life was great. I was actually getting ready for our team dinner when my parents called me. I don't remember a whole lot about that evening. My roommates packed my bags and one of them drove me 4 hours home. When I walked in the door my family was gathered around the dinner table. I remember having Italian Wedding Soup. I remember reviving a blessing. And I remember not being able to fall asleep.
The following morning I woke up to my grandma screaming "Get UP! It's SNOWING! WE NEED TO LEAVE NOW!". Quite dramatic. Comical now. But also serious. We had to get out of our little mountain town and to Phoenix Children's Hospital in time for my surgery. When it snows, they often close the road between home and Phoenix. My uncle called a friend who told us to get to the edge of town and he'd have a squad car take us through. (Perks of living in a small town).
The next few minutes were chaotic. My grandma was running through the house and stubbed her toe on the evil coffee table. It was sticking out perpendicular to her foot. Clearly broken. My dad (a doctor) told her he needed to set it. She sat down and held her foot up. He reached for the toe and...BAM! She kicked him! He said, in so many words, that she could deal with a broken toe, and we were out the door.
My parent's driveway is long and steep. And it was covered in quite a few inches of snow. Somehow, we managed to make it down (sliding the whole way) safely. As we made it to the outskirts of town, we could see the cars backed up and at a complete halt. My dad drove up the edge and sure enough, the squad car was waiting for us. We were informed that if there was any incident driving the pass, we would be held solely accountable. Considering the circumstances, we pushed onward.
Soon enough we were at the hospital waiting in pre-op. I remember my best friend being there, just like she always was, along with my family. That's really all I remember until I woke up from surgery. I've been told though, that I was waving like a princess as they wheeled me back to surgery.
The next thing I remember is waking up in ICU and being told that once the chest tube was out, they would move me up to the 2nd floor. My. Heart. Stopped.
The second floor is the cancer floor. That was my home 4 years earlier. That's where I fought for my life. And if they were sending me there than that must mean that something is not right. Thankfully, they were doing it out of kindness, thinking I would "feel most at home there". Bless their hearts. And it was nice to see my nurses and know that I'd be taken care of.
Thankfully, a few days later I was released with a clean bill of health. The growth was a benign. A "gang of cells" that formed together to mimic a Ewing's Tumor. What a relief.
What is even crazier is... years after this event, I'm sitting with my inlaws talking about the day that my nephew was born. My mother in law is telling me about this crazy morning, when they woke up to snow and my sister in law was bound and determined to get to Mesa to have her baby. I thought, "gosh this sounds familiar...". They were the last people that were let through, given the same warning we received. Yep. 6 years ago on this day our nephew was born! I think that is pretty darn cool. Happy birthday Kaden!!!
Today, at this moment, I am sitting at my parent's dinner table with my husband and grandma. We are in the middle of about 4 different projects. I am working on a puzzle, my husband is on a call with an app designer for his business, I am writing this, and my grandma is addressing envelopes for what I am thinking is a surprise party... for me (I'll be 10 years cancer free in February)... hehe. It's funny how life works isn't it?
This post is more of a memoir for me I suppose. It serves no real purpose. There is no motivation that a reader can walk away with. Sorry. But it feels good for me to write about this experience because it's one that I tend to forget (by choice perhaps?).
<3 Mo
(insert princess wave here)
This post does serve a purpose. Not only is it healing for you, you are sharing what is important to you. You are an amazing person, Moquie, you have so much to give to others. Keep on writing and keep on smiling. Your smile is contagious.
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